R-E-S-P-E-C-T Find out what it means to you

A 2018 Georgetown University Survey found that amongst the 20,000 participants surveyed, that respect was the most desired trait for leaders, and yet incidences of disrespect are increasing.

A 2022 survey of my friends and peers (certainly not 20,000) found that respect is an extremely difficult concept to define; one that is informed by an individual's past experiences, values, beliefs, cultural norms, preferred communication styles, and so much more. So how does a workplace generate a shared vision of what mutual respect looks like?

As I mentioned, my friends and peers each defined respect differently; some in small ways, and others in more drastic terms. Some said to be nice, kind, and considerate of each other, their wants/needs, and current mental/emotional state. Others felt that respect was more about admiring someone for their strengths, capabilities, and skills and acknowledging that, and in some ways, deferring to that person in situations in which they had the superior skills or knowledge set. Some even asserted that respect meant relating, speaking, and connecting to them on their terms, in a way that they deem convenient and acceptable. Okay, the last one might have been my interpretation based upon the answers that they gave. However, I still feel that it holds up. 

A cursory glance through various articles online didn't reveal much on how to identify, nor create, respectful work environments. One common suggestion thrown out as a way to create respect at work is "treat others how you would like to be treated".

I think this notion is short-sighted and problematic. Knowing that respect is an extremely individualistic concept, why would you believe that your definition of respect, in any way, relates to them? It also centers one person's interpretation of respect as the mold, and if anything deviates from that, it is disrespectful. This made me circle back to my earlier notion on respect; that respect is more about ensuring that the way that you relate to me doesn't cause me inconvenience. Phrased somewhat differently, I want you to ensure that none of your choices will cause me any adverse reacts or consequences. This implies that respect is very much tied to our relationship with trust, which I wrote about earlier. 

So, for me, respect is created when there are shared community guidelines, generated collectively, that everyone consents to, with acknowledgment of consequences and a process to address harm that is rooted in principles of transformative justice. This means attending to our impact in work environments as opposed to just defending our intentions.  Respect also comes about when a culture of honesty, transparency, and candor is modeled and encouraged; this culture of honesty and transparency extends to our contributions, both our successes and mistakes. Respect results from curiosity about other's communication preferences, learning styles, and ways that they would like to be treated.

How would you define respect? What key pillars are essential to you and what informs your definition of respect?